workbook day 16

Saying NO CHOICE to Unplanned eating
This is where my ‘rebellious teenager’ voice creeps in. I fool myself into thinking I can get away with things. Unfortunately each action has a price; it’s the law of cause and effect. If I over-eat I may get sick, but if I ‘substitute’ it’s easier to fool myself that this is an OK variation. Unfortunately, ‘substitutions’ start small (tomato for cucumber), but grow larger (chips instead of salad). My resistance muscle needs lots of work.

I am remembering to notice when I do something right in relationship to my diet, but I am forgetting to use my ‘counter’. It worked better in the summer because I wore shorts with pockets. Guess I’ll stop the ‘counter’ and record some of the improvements I notice.

workbook day 15

Start Diet
Weight: 189.5 (base line)
Back on track. The morning review session is easier for me than the evening planning session. I have gotten out of the habit of planning in the evening. The modifications I have made are important to my health and are reasonable. I know that I won’t drop more than .5 lb per week, but that is my goal. I do need to work with my Response Cards more. I remember the important ones and catch myself saying them to myself, but seeing them will be another form of reinforcement. Today was my Tai Chi class, so exercise was fun. Today I reminded myself to schedule ‘snack food’ (cheerios) for while I am watching the ballgame tomorrow. Anticipating eating triggers is a challenge. I did a good job grocery shopping in a healthy manner, planning to cook a ‘new meal’ tomorrow, using my Calendar to include diet and exercise time into my schedule, and using my Wellness Journal.

workbook day 13, 14

Day 13 & 14
Decrease Hunger and Cravings
One distraction that works for me is walking on the treadmill. Other effective methods are drinking a bottle of water, playing a computer game, reading, looking through a catalog, reading a book. If I do my distraction for 15 minutes, then the craving usually passes.
GET READY FOR TOMORROW
Knowing that I can modify my diet each evening to reflect something I’d like to have, as long as I chart the calories, helps. Tomorrow is my grocery shopping day, so that also encourages me to be healthy in my choices. I have purchased a couple of interesting books to learn about whole grains and other healthy foods.

Workbook Day 11 & Day 12

Difference between Hunger, Desire, and Cravings and Prove you Can Tolerate Hunger and Cravings:
Since the workbook exercises are review for me, I’ve decided to ‘do what I know how to do’ as I work through each day’s exercise from this point on. What this means is that I will be doing one day at a time, after today, by doing my evening review and planning session for the next day. Day 12 is my least favorite exercise. I have been afraid of hunger. I get the ‘shakes’ easily when I skip a meal. Oh, well. It’s just one day, & I’ll have a dinner I like. Besides, I’ve not cleared my system (that 3 day period it takes for the body to ‘panic’ about not having food), and haven’t officially restarted my diet, so I’ll probably sail through the exercise this time. Last time I made it 5 hours. (This time I made it 6 hours.)

Also, last summer I made a chart to go with this exercise. This is adapted from Judith Beck’s definitions, but I added “addiction” because sometimes I go ‘mindless’ and it gets past the Craving stage:
Hunger: haven’t eaten for many hours, specific body sensations (empty sensation in stomach, rumblings…anything will satisfy me)
Desire: just eaten but want to eat more, social or time response eating (specific thing sounds good)
Craving: strong urge to eat, tension and unpleasant physical yearning sensation (only xxx will do)
Addiction: anxiety + poor boundaries (unable/unwilling to restrict, unwilling to delay gratification; fear based eating; nothing will stop me from getting xxx to eat)

What I observed: At first, I was more aware of being thirsty rather than hungry. My craving will usually be for chocolate (sugar & chololate = 3 Musketeers), and will usually hit after 3pm if my protein intake has not been good for the day. I was aware of noon as a time to eat, by the clock. I didn’t really want to eat, I was just aware of the time. Around 3pm I experienced moderate hunger and a strong craving. I exercised and the craving lessened, but the hunger did not. By 4pm I started getting the shakes so it was the end of the exercise. One thing I learned is that sometimes I have a desire AND hunger, which can pull me off my plan of what I had intended to eat. If I can separate the desire for a specific thing to eat from hunger, then I will probably be more successful.

Workbook day 8, 9, 10

Workbook Day 8
Make Time
A few minor adjustments in my ‘plan’ from this summer, and I’ve got the scheduling under control. Now it is ‘just do it’. I review my eating plan in the morning as I take my vitamins & record my weight. I check my ‘to do’ list, and add any adjustments that need to be made. During the day I record what I eat (which is the part that takes the most ‘remembering time’.) In the evening I review the day, making any corrections to my Wellness Journal plan, record the day on FitDay, then plan my eating schedule for the next day.
Workbook Day 9
Get Moving!
I have scheduled planned exercise, what I will do when, in my Calendar and in my Wellness Journal. My plan is to start with 15 minutes on the treadmill on Monday and Friday, and work up to 30 minute sessions. I will do ½ hr session of pilates on T or R and a 5 minute review session on the opposite day. I will attend a 1 hr Tai Chi class on Wednesday, and do a 5 minute review on Saturday or Sunday. For some people this may not be a lot of exercise. For me, it is a challenge. I will also record the spontaneous exercise I do during the day (walks, play with the dog, mall crawl, etc.) This is where my Wellness Journal can keep me accountable. Because I have everything on one page, it serves as a reminder.
Workbook Day 10
Set Achievable Goals
I know that the goals I identified previously violate the ‘don’t set an ultimate goal’ instruction, but I have been there in the last 3 years and know I can get there again. The hardest part of the goals I have set for myself is to lose no more than 4 lbs. of muscle while I drop 43 lbs of fat. That is why exercise is so important to me. I will probably have to add some work with weights in order to build muscle, but that will be decided several weeks into the diet phase.
The most important part of this lesson for me is to celebrate each 5 lb mini-goal. I am pleased that I have been able to celebrate 2 mini-goals, and keep them off. I will report my success in terms of mini-goals, but will track them in terms of trend.

workbook days 4, 5, 6, & 7

Workbook Day 4
Build Your Confidence:
This is a lesson that is important for me. To help reinforce the times I give myself credit, I use a counter. I put it in my pocket at the beginning of the day, and record the number of clicks I’ve given myself at the end of the day. Some behaviors get an extra click if the behavior is extra hard. For example, I’ve not officially ‘restarted’ my diet, so the temptation for a ‘last meal’ at McDonald’s was strong. I resisted, and gave myself an extra click for the extra difficulty. I also reviewed the Thoughts/Responses I had previously written, and added some more thoughts.

Workbook Day 5
Slow Down and Be Mindful:
There are several parts to this lesson for me.
1. Slow Down: Eating fast is not much of a problem for me. If I do, I get sick. Also, gastric bypass surgery retraining has taught me to enjoy the first bite. Because I can never be absolutely confident how quickly I will ‘fill up’, I am aware of the order in which I eat my food. Salad is eaten last. Protein and veggies are eaten towards the beginning of the meal, starches are eaten toward the end. I rarely eat dessert. Frequently I will ‘save’ part of my meal for the next planned snack.
2. Eating at a table is not something I do, unless I go out to eat or have company over for a meal. Being ‘required’ to eat at a table by myself actually causes me to feel stressed and resentful. I did my exercise today, but will continue to follow my normal pattern. I eat while watching TV, which serves the purpose of companionship during the meal. I have decided that driving or reading or working on the computer are distractions that lead me to eat without thinking about it, so I won’t do these. I have decided to continue to eat my meals while watching TV. Where I need to become more mindful is when I am eating a scheduled snack. In the past I have eaten snacks as I worked on the computer or watched TV. Now I will not eat meal or snack while on the computer. This will help me stay mindful of what I am eating.
3. Focusing on every bite. Even when I am watching TV and eating, I am aware of each bite I eat. One challenge is that my hand shakes. If I am not aware of what I am eating, it will fall off the fork. Guess there are some advantages to a shaky hand.

Workbook Day 6
Meet with Your Diet Coach
As before, I intend to use journaling on the Beck diet site as my diet coach. I have also decided to continue interacting on line with others who are familiar with CBT as a tool for weight management.

Workbook Day 7
Organize Your Environment
I am pleased to say that the changes I made last summer to support my efforts have remained. As I looked through my cupboards and fridg, there was only one sack of potato chips that needed to be addressed. Good for me. I’ve started using my clicker, located my timers, and step counter. Tomorrow will be … scheduling and re-starting my exercise routine. As I do these activities, I can hear the Thought/Responses from the summer in the back of my head. I am pleased at how much I have retained from my summer work.

Workbook Day 2 & 3

Commit to a Diet Plan:
As during the summer, I will be using a Daily Wellness Journal (by Andrew Lessman from HSN). This allows me to track quantity, quality, feeling, and time when I eat 3 meals & 3 snacks. It also lets me track supplements, exercise, and several other health goals I’ve set for myself. It’s a great tracking tool. To this, I will add tracking what I eat on FitDay. I appreciate the graphs and nutritional information available on this site, and find it efficient to use. I have sporadically used this site since 2002, so I have some interesting comparison information on it.
The actual diet will be a 3+3, protein heavy, limited sugar diet. When I was dieting before I listed the choices I liked for meals, snacks, fruits & veggies. I have revised this list and copied it to my Welness Journal. These will be the backbone of my diet. But the key for me is to keep my protein intake up. To this end, at least one of my snacks each day is a protein drink. I mix protein powder in milk in a Magic Bullet with DaVinci sugar-free syrups & ice, and it is just like having a treat once or twice a day.

There are some other ‘diet guidelines’ I am setting for myself:
- limit alcohol (I must plan it the night before)
- limit diet cola drinks (drink 1 bottle of water for each cola drink)
- increase whole grain foods
- increase veggies and fruit

I am starting a ‘new’ Wellness Journal, and am over half finished setting it up with the additional health goals I have set for myself.

One change I am making from “Becking” this summer is that I am going to use the To-Do List each day. I have a personalized list that I created from later lessons that I have put in my Wellness Journal, but I will be checking off each task in the workbook as I do them.

Day 3: Sit Down to Eat
This is not a problem for me, as long as I don’t have to sit at a table. It is not the idea of sitting, but being distracted while sitting and eating that I am working on. I sit at the computer and eat; I watch TV and eat; I drive and eat. Each of these activities take my attention away from eating. So, my challenge is to reduce distractions while eating.

I am not sure how long it will take me to get to the point where I am working on the lessons individually, so… more later…

just got the workbook – Day 1

I was pleased to get my Beck Weight Loss Workbook in the mail today. I am going to work through each of the days and ‘get serious’. Weight loss and exercise are usually fall projects for me, so I look forward to continuing my journey. This was a ‘regular’ weigh in day for me, so I will start tracking my progress from here in 5 pound mini-goals. I had recently revised my Advantages and Goals Lists, so, here they are… again…
Advantages for Weight Loss
Feel greater self-esteem
- Feel more youthful and vigorous
- Feel comfortable wearing stylish clothes
- Feel comfortable in a bathing suit at 65
- Feel in control of my body
(be less self-critical, more confident, enjoy feeling of accomplishment, less self-conscious, happier when I look in the mirror, happier when I step on the scales)

Improve health
- Reduce risk of diabetes and heart disease
- Decrease stress and pains in joints
- One way to monitor healthy eating habits

Easier to exercise: which will preserve my ability to function well—
- stamina, strength, flexibility, balance
- improve proportion of legs to body
- Have more energy
- Be able to do a wider variety of activities
- Be less likely to fall
- Increase my lean muscle mass

My purpose: I enjoy a healthy, active life of
shared fulfillment and abundance.
There are five components of my purpose:
- enjoyment
- healthy life
- active life
- shared fulfillment
- shared abundance
And three areas to work on:
- spiritual growth (classes)
- body (exercise, diet, weight, clothes)
- home (cleaning, gardening, budget)
Who am I doing this for? ME
My life is made up of these Vital Areas:
physical, emotional (family, friends, self), financial, intellectual, social, and spiritual.

GOALS:
Weight:
145 (goal)
192 (now)
-47 lbs (in 5 lb mini-goals)

BMI
23.4 (goal)
31 (now)
-7.6

BMI: Normal=18.5-24.9
Overweight=25-29.9 (185 lbs=29.9)
obesity= over 30

%body fat
27% (goal)
43% (now)
-16% body fat

Body Fat %: Essential 10-12%
Fitness 21-24%
Acceptable 25-31%
Obese 32+%

lbs body fat
40 (goal)
83 (now)
-43 lbs fat

lbs lean
105 (goal)
109(now)
no more than -4 lbs lean max loss

EXERCISE GOALS:
- BUILD MUSCLE
- weight bearing = 20 mins
- flexibility & balance

The goal that I anticipate being the most difficult to attain is keeping my lean body mass loss to no more than -4 lbs while dropping 43 lbs of fat. That will require LOTS of exercise, but it is do-able.

small victories count

Weight: lost last week – 2 lbs (-.5/5) 3rd mini goal
Weight: lost this week maintained (-.5.5) 3rd mini goal
I was pleased that I maintained over a holiday weekend. I didn’t indulge, but I also didn’t do my eating plan ahead of time. What I was most pleased with was driving home last night after my study group, I wanted to eat ’something’, but I was also a little bit hungry. I realized that craving/hunger is not always a black/white distinction. I knew something was going on when I started noticing fast food places on my drive home. I became amazed at how many of them are open at 10:30 at night. I made a bargain with myself to ‘eat something real when I get home’, and it worked. Just that little extra effort to delay for a short time so I could make a healthy decision was a victory for me.

Weigh in day

Weight: lost last week -.5 (-3.5/5) 2nd mini goal
Weight: lost this week – 2 lbs (-.5/5) 3rd mini goal
Good weight loss this week. Now on to the next mini goal. I am in the process of re-reading TBDS, and I surprised at the difference in what I ’see’ on this reading. What is nice is that I have found out that the things I thought I never could do… well, that was just faulty thinking.